This Is The Most Public of My Many Humiliations

Sunday, February 27, 2005

So its been a while. I have learned a few lessons. And have spent that last few days at a Interwest "resort"(i use that term loosely).

Pictures and a story to follow.

soon. like tomorow sometime. im serious. promise.

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Tuesday, February 22, 2005

As I awoke yesterday morning,I was surprised to hear that my favorite writer had taken his own life. I was first turned on to his writing when I was 17 years old. I wrote an ISU(independant Study Unit) on Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas for my Gr. 11 English class, I chose "loss of innocence" as the theme. I received the highest mark(97%) out of both classes in both semesters. It was a strange feeling cause I had never really accomplished such an outstanding mark on such a huge project. Especially because I did the whole thing the night before it was due. I sometimes think that my teacher marked me easier on it because of the subject I choose. He told me he was a fan of Gonzo Journalism about a year later, in the strip club near my house. He was a very cool teacher, young super intelligent, and nice. He actually liked me. Probably the only teacher in the history of time that actually gave 2 shits about where I was going to end up in the next few years.
I remember that night at the strip club like it was yesterday. I was there with my friends, Tyler and Brent(the guy who wrote me the shark email below). I noticed my teacher sitting drinking, so Brent Tyler and I joined him. He was obviously drunk, he had just lost his fiancee, because he had lost his job as a teacher. As it seems the administration does not look kindly on teachers who smoke dope with students. He was very depressed because of these reasons. He told me to pick up the book "where the buffalo roam" because it was the best. We drank more and more Heiniken, and he offered us a ride home. Brent and I exited the car at deer run park. Because he was drunk and we figured we would be safer if we walked the rest of the way. The next morning i left for kingston too see my girlfriend at the time. I remember getting there and reading in the news paper: "Man fire bombs two Masques" and thinking nothing of it. Untill i actually read the article. As it seems, my teacher being very fucked up from the loss of his job, and it being only a few short weeks after the 9/11 attacks, decieded to take justice into his own hands after he had dropped brent and I off. I was beyond disapointed as i read the article, and ever cried. This man was basically my hero, and i was totally crushed to find out he could do something so stupid. Its just not his style.
Much as i am crushed right now, because i cant believe hunter would take his own life. Its just not his style.
i think i will buy where the buffalo roam today.

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Sunday, February 20, 2005

What up playa,

It's saturday night and i just got in from downtown...kinda pissed cause i blew it with some sweetie tonight...and ended up calling her sister a wannabe JAP, 'cept i didn't know it was her sister...thats how smooth i am...anyways when i was boozing with some people i saw some dude at the bar, kinda stragglin' and by himself so i went up to the bar like i normally do and starting chattin the guy...he was a hardcore local to hali and he ended being a fisherman, anyways he wouldn't stop talkin about sharks in the waters off nova scotia...and me being so intrigued with sharks...i started yappin back...i was like "what the hell do you know about sharks...your a fuckin fisherman...,man I did like 5 projects on them in public school, and I've seen Jaws like 30 times...don't even talk to me about sharks old man"...anyways he wasn't hearing me anymore...especially since I starting chanting the Jaws theme song..."duhnuh duhnuh duhnuh throughout the bar...point of my story which is ironic, and pretty much lmakes me look like a punk uni student...was a few minutes ago when got in, I searched up sharks caught in nova scotia in google...and came across a site where in september they caught a mako shark in yarmouth which isn't far from hali...and the fucked up thing...the old guy that i ripped on...is the older guy in the background (I'm positive) of this photo...THAT IS FUCKED UP...

Small world...but y'know me...it ain't gonna stop me form chirpin'...haha...I just needed to say that story to someone...

Peace Bro,
B

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Saturday, February 19, 2005

Sinnerman where you gunna run to
Sinnerman where you gunna run to
Where you gunna run to
All on that day



Well I run to the rock
Please hide me I run to the rock
Please hide me I run to the rock
Please hide me lord
All on that day



Well the rock cried out
I can’t hide you the rock cried out
I can’t hide you the rock cried out
I ain’t gunna hide you god
All on that day



I said rock what’s a matter with you rock
Don’t you see I need you rock
Don’t let down
All on that day



So I run to the river
It was bleedin I run to the sea
It was bleedin I run to the sea
It was bleedin all on that day



So I run to the river it was boilin
I run to the sea it was boilin
I run to the sea it was boilin
All on that day



So I run to the lord
Please help me lord
Don’t you see me prayin
Don’t you see me down here prayin



But the lord said
Go to the devil
The lord said
Go to the devil
He said go to the devil
All on that day



So I ran to the devil
He was waiting
I ran to the devil he was waiting
I ran to the devil he was waiting
All on that day

Oh yeah



Oh I run to the river
It was boilin I run to the sea
It was boilin I run to the sea
It was boilin all on that day



So I ran to the lord
I said lord hide me
Please hide me
Please help me
All on that day



Said God where were you
When you are old and prayin



Lord lord hear me prayin
Lord lord hear me prayin
Lord lord hear me prayin
All on that day



Sinnerman you oughta be prayin
Oughta be prayin sinnerman
Oughta be prayin all on that day

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Friday, February 18, 2005

Yesterday, I was convinced that I was not going to survive my surgery. I even wrote a post/will, that was to be published at my demise. But of course, things went as planned and the surgery was a success. Though I was kicked out of the hospital.
As it seems, the drugs that they gave me to knock me out, also put me in a grumpy mood. The nurse woke me up in the recovery room, and I don't really remember what I did. I think I was overly rude to her, the wheeled me into the recovery room. I started swearing, and asking them if I could leave. Not one nurse was paying attention, and this made me more grumpy. I began to swear like a sailor and threatened to take out my IV, and leave under my own accord. I got super paranoid, I thought the nurses were drugging my water. This is why I didn't want to get knocked out.
So after they had, had enough of my ranting, they brought and early release form, and asked me to sign it.
My father was not impressed with my behavior, and to think about it, neither am I. But it wasn't me acting like an asshole, it was the drugs.
when the girl was knocking me out, I asked her if I could get some of her magic knock out potion in a take home bag. Then she told me I looked like Adam sandler.

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Thursday, February 17, 2005

hi all,
i go into surgery today in about 2 hours. If there isnt a post here by tomorow at the same time, i have died on the operating table. I hope they give me a morphine drip.
Just in case i dont make it, i want you all to see this

wish me luck.

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Wednesday, February 16, 2005

So I am at the hospital today. All went well at my Pre Op, appointment. Though they did tell me that they did not want me using crutches or a cane, when the surgery is done. This sucks because I had just bought an expensive stylish cane that I wanted to use post surgery.



so after my appointment I wonder down into the cafeteria to grab some water, and maybe a bite to eat as I await my ride to come and fetch me. I grab a bottled water from Tim Hortons, sit down and begin to watch this girl that is having struggles with the soda pop vending machine. It seems that she had put in $1 when the pop actually cost $1.25. I watched her struggle with the coin return button for a while looking stressed out. So I (being the noble gentleman that I am) place a dollar on the table in front of her. She looks up at my with wide eyes, and a large smile and says "thanks, thank you so much, the stupid machine wouldn't give me my money back". She was a volunteer for the hospital, so I felt like she deserved to have something to drink on break. At this point one of her co-workers(male) walks up takes my dollar off the table, hands it back to me, and hands the girl the quarter she needed. Shoot its like I just cant help people now adays. The guy was obviously jealous that I had been so chivalrous, to the girl that (I am guessing) he has been in love with since he started his lame ass orderly job at the hospital.
She gave me a wink and thanked me again as she walked away. The guy gave me a look, obviously disgruntled, walked away and took a seat with his friends.
At this point my ride arrived. Hopefully, she sees me after my surgery tomorow and treats me as nicely as I tried to treat her today.
Other things my observant mind noticed while I was waiting for my ride were : Most nurses seem fairly unhappy. I don't think I saw one smile, there are seriously tight nurse cliques(to the point where I saw one nurse actually afraid to sit with a table full of them). That is pretty much all I noticed, as you can tell, when I am at the hospital my mind is on one thing.... NURSES.

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Tuesday, February 15, 2005

I am beyond addicted to EBAY. I wont lie to you, the computer has turned into my needle, and ebay the heroin. I have spent about $2000 since i first started ebaying about 3 weeks ago. I have bought Boss suits, and other clothing galore. Right now i am bidding on 2 TV's and a computer. I dont know what i will do if i win. I am really running low on cash. I might have to start selling on ebay. Speaking of selling, before i put this stuff on ebay i will give you all a chance to buy it. I have a Baseball glove signed by last years Yankee's, ummm a crate full of unopened 1991 uperdeck baseball cards(like 200 packs of unopened cards), I have a Diamond ring worth about 1200 USD it has never been worn, and is still in the box. I want to sell it for about 500 usd. Its really nice and has huge diamonds.
also i will be selling my body for $5 Or best offer.

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Monday, February 14, 2005

Its cold in here. I need to do my shirt laundry. My head is pounding with every never ending beat of my heart. This headache has lasted a few days now, and I am starting to wonder when it is going to end. With every heart beat, it feel like an electric shot is sent to my brain.
My lip is all sore and bitten.



Holy fuck its Valentines day. Talk about forgetful. I also forgot that I had a Pre-Op appointment this morning. My surgery is on Thursday, I really hope missing this appointment doesn't push the date back. I want to be on a beach in Costa Rica in a month, not in a hospital bed counting dots on the ceiling.
My hair is really dirty and wolverine esque right now. I need to do something about this soon. I want to go out to diner tonite, at superior. I have no date, so I might go alone. How would that be. A solo diner on St. Vals day.
, suck.
I have a lot more to write about, but don't have the time.
Happy Valentines day to all the broken hearts.


To follow the 'forgetfulness of gsusking' theme this post has. I forgot to mention that I watched the unofficial premier of Corruption In Cancun last night. It contained all original footage from the 2001 adventure my friends and I had in cancun. Lucas of AddictiveProductions.com(pictured above) edited it all and made quite a nice short film out of it. I am going to make a torrent of it some how, and then have a link to it on the site. You all can watch it and laugh your asses off.

And If ANYONE IN MONTREAL is reading this. CHECK THIS OUT ENJOY.

ok, I don't think I am forgetting anything else.

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Friday, February 11, 2005

My friend stevie picks his nose and throws it on Masta. I find it entertaining. I constantly ask stevie to throw more boogers at him. I think i have a problem.
If they offered a 12 step program, i would be on tv saying:

"Not just the President but a member too"

But Masta does not seem to enjoy this as much as i do, and he chases stevie around the house in circles. Masta is stumpy and slow, and stevie is tiny and quick like lightning. Some punchs are thrown they both yell and then laugh and hug. They walk back in to the room, arms over each others shoulders, smiling and being dumb, then when masta is least expecting it.,, stevie knocks him in the balls, and runs of again.

i love those guys.

except when stevie wipes boggers on me, then i dont love him.

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"not to alarm you, but there possibly is a bogeyman, or bogeymen in the house"



Man this blog world I have gotten myself into is filled with so much BS drama
this guy is fucking this girl. This girl is fucking this guy, while she has a bf.
This girl smoked crack then gave 2 guys a blow job at the sametime(big mouth I guess)
but yeah
I don't deal well with drama
like that commercial says.
"change the channel"......"Drama"....."Change the channel".... "Drama"

fuck this I am changing the channel.

I don't want to be a part of drama. FUCK DRAMA. Drama is used by people who are bored, and they use it to make their lives entertaining.

But I love gossip. dun get me wrong.

rushed-update.com

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Thursday, February 10, 2005

I love getting wake-up text's on my cell phone. Today I was I got woken up right in time to start watching Dawson's Creek. They started playing them from the beginning yesterday. I think it is hilarious that they try to pass adult actors off as 15 year olds, I don't find it very believable. Dawsons vocabulary surpasses that of a philosophy professor.



I feel sorry for everyone who has to work/goto school because they can not enjoy 'The Creek' as I do. I know that every bum who isn't working or isn't in school is defiantly watching that show. Its like a rule. If you are ever home sick, or don't feel like going to school, you have to spend the morning watching TBS(the superstation).



Next week I go in for knee surgery. I m super nervous cause they have to knock me out to do the procedure. I hate going under. I really hate it, I've been having bad dreams about not waking up from the surgery, and let me tell you something, they ant helping my situation. I feel like I am a murderer, and my surgery is my sentencing hearing. I really really don't want to go. Im actually contemplating taking off to Mexico or somewhere warm and hiding out for a bit.



I love the location of my PC in my house. Its right over a hot air vent, so I can sit here in my boxers and type blog posts comfortably.


TRONGUY

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Wednesday, February 09, 2005

"Its the crazy ones that have the good pills"


I've been trying really hard lately to keep my rebellious nature in check. It is working, but I don't know how much longer I can conform to every twist and turn 'the norm' throws at me.
I don't have any Cigs, I hate when this happens. I wish I had someone I could call and tell them to bring me cigs, and food. That would be the best. If anyone would like to volunteer for this position, my email address is above.

Sometimes people look for conflict as a form of entertainment. I say these people are stupid, and should join G.W Bush in The White House. Cause we all know he bombs women, children and hospitals as a form of entertainment. But that is on a whole different level then the people I am talking about. I am talking about people who start and argument just too entertain there overpowering mind, or because they are bored with the life god has delt them. They either try to belittle others while making themselves feel better, or just sit there making annoying arguments, that really don't make sense in anyone's mind but their own.

I wish I could go through puberty again.

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Tuesday, February 08, 2005

"... run away from the pain.."


On the way home from the hot tub session on Friday night, I had my fave cabdriver ever. He used to pick me up basically every day 6 am, at Sean-elise's house. He remembered me. We shot the shit as Aerosmith's: "Janie's got a gun" began to play on the radio, my friends all began singing and talking about hanging out the sun roof. Cause you see, this was a high class cab we were in, it had a sun roof. How awesome is that going to be in the summer when I am flagging around the city. I will have a means to display my anger at traffic as I hang out the roof, throwing creamer containers acquired from the local greasy spoon.

If I was a simple man, would we still walk hand in hand
if I suddenly went blind, would you still look in my eyes
what happens when I am old, and all my stories have been told.

Dallas Green (of Alexisonfire) is probably the best show of talent I have ever seen, if you haven't had a chance to listen to some of his solo, acoustic work, I suggest you do so soon. He is a multi-talented artist that deserves some recognition beyond that of what he does for Alexisonfire.



I wish I was an anime character. Then all my emotions would just be strokes of ink on an artists canvas. But I am not a stroke of ink, I am a living, breathing, fucking, human being. I wonder how long I can go on like this. It feels like everything is surreal. Like I am living a lucid dream. Its like I fear no consequences for my actions. Or is it I don't expect any consequences for what I do.

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Monday, February 07, 2005

This is Greg, he lives with The James in montreal, he is the man, and the rumors of him being a serial drunk dialer are totally farce. HA.
He drives an escape that serves him well. He has even driven me home from montreal b4.
He is the man.

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Sunday, February 06, 2005

This is a candid picture of me taken in montreal a month or so ago. It was right after my friend got in a fight with these two dudes, and i was there to run my mouth off, cause well that is what i am good at. You can see me in mid-chirp while this picture was taken.
I dont really remember what i said, but i am sure it was along the lines of "hey, fuck you, dont think you are tough cause you have a camoprint jacket u lil punk"
This night I almost got my ass kicked, ha, yeah right not even close. My buddy got pretty beat up though.
Anyway its all good now, just thought that that pic was funny, then i totally remembered the story behind it, i just had a total momento moment.
im just scared myself. Thats no good.

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Saturday, February 05, 2005

"...Two drifters off to see the world.."


So then when it all gets down to the nitty gritty. I know who robbed my house, and I don't really know what to do about it. I told myself after it happened: "self. When you find out who this is(cause you know you will) do not do anything about it. Just leave it alone, why make more trouble".
But now, I am faced with a serious problem. It is taking every ounce of "maturity" in my body, not to take care of these people who invaded my home, and removed my family's false sense of security.

I am really torn, I know I should just let it go, take the hit and be the bigger person in the situation. But there is another side of me, a side that this 'blog' never really sees. A side that wants to do something about this little situation I am in. Yesterday it felt like someone drugged my drink(though I didn't have a drink to drug). I felt all fucked up and dizzy and not myself. I kinda liked it, but didn't at the same time, I was all nervous, and my sight was really fucked up.

So today I will list the worst movies of all time:


Stuck on You


A Night At The Roxbury

umm that's about it.

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Thursday, February 03, 2005

This is the hottest picture i have taken in a while. so i decieded to share it with y'all.
So I will list the reasons why i love my friends.

1) Instead of eating dinner they play drinking games.

that is all.

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"they lifted the prints off the frame"


So, i rarely have anything cool or exciting to write about, which really sucks.
Krista is going around planting trees with her band, and dropping out of uni. Fuck she is a seriously tough girl. Tree planting then touring with a band. She is my type of women.



It is my friend Kelly's Bday in a week, she is turning 20, and lives on the other side of the pond in England, near Bristol i believe. I havent seen what she looks like in a long time. It is comming up on 2 years since i have seen her in person
i wonder what she looks like. She is not cool enough to know how to scan photos, so i will just have to wait to see her untill when i go and visit her. Or she comes here to visit me, as she has promised she will over the past 1.5 years.



I really want to goto england thought, but that involves me getting a passport, and a visa, And all this other stuff that i dont know what it is.
I have never owned a passport, i know that sounds strange but it is true, i should get on that sometime soon. Not having one ruined my trip to panama, but it wasnt all my fault. I was a travel virgin at the time, and knew not about airports, passports
and such. So they turned me away at the gate, and said 'sorry son ur SOL'.
I whined and i pouted and could do nothing about it. So i went to the place that sold me the vacation and told them "fuck you guys" but then bought another $1400 dollar trip from them 4 mins later. They still kept my money for the first trip those commie bastards.


FUCK FLIGHTCENTER

PS. I didnt eat yesterday, and havent yet today. HUNGERSTRIKE WHAT. I dont really know why i havent eaten, just havent, i just stood up and got a killer rush. id better get some food in me now before i pass the F out.

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Tuesday, February 01, 2005

I need a camera.

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This work is licensed under a Creative Commons License.

"I am a pathalogical liar, and can not be trusted. So all of this can be as fake as it is real."
GSUSKING

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