This Is The Most Public of My Many Humiliations

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

When I was a kid(12-18, there was not much to be done in this city. So my friends and I would hang out at the local strip mall after school was finished. We would sit, shoulder tap for cigarettes, and beer. On the weekends we would drop acid, and harass mall patrons, until the cops would arrive. My friends and I were very territorial of this mall, if any other group of kids came and tried to hang out there, we would chase them away with threats of violence. This is how I originally met my friend The James. I think I was trying to steal his pizza, or something equally as nominal. You see, he and his friends were a year younger then me, and were always hanging out at my mall. I didn't like this, so when I saw them, I would try to steal their pizza, cigarettes, and drugs. I am trying to remember exactly how that day evolved. I believe James and his friends began to stand up to the Iron fist that was me and my friends. I then wanted to fight James to prove that there could only be one gang of kids at the mall. I followed him home, talking shit about his mom, dad, dog, and whatever else 15 year old kids make fun of. I tried to fight him, but it was to no avail. I just walked away, thinking "damn I hate that kid". When I really didn't hate him, or really have a reason to fight him. It was just something to do.

My whole teenaged life was basically spent at this mall. It got so over run with our kiddie gang, that they had to hire Rent-A-Cops to come and make sure we weren't there fucking with people, and just hanging around. By this time, my gang of friends, had become buddies with James gang of friends. So we were a super elite mall kids gang. The Mall Cops were just an extra dose of entertainment for us. We would drop Acid on a Friday night and wait for them to start there shift. We would try to time it as so when we were just peaking on our acid, the dudes would start their shift and come and tell us to leave. This is when the shit hit the fan. We would harass the shit outta them, from one end of the mall to the other. We would be so fucked, we would just walk into the grocery store grab eggs from cartons, or tomatoes right off the rack, then walk out and just sit there and throw them at the rent-a-cops. They were not impressed by this, but there would be so many of us 15/14 year olds, that they really could do nothing to stop us. If they tried to fight us, we would be so fucked up on the acid, we would just laugh, and mimic them as we watched the trees melt into
the sky.

After a while, I think the property manager realized that we were:
A) the mall cops were not accomplishing anything
B) us kids were far to fucked up to be messed with
because, one day they just stopped coming. I guess we had grown up, not needing to use the mall as a crutch of excitement.
I miss those days. Totally care free in a acid haze.

I hear that they have new mall cops now though, to deal with the new gang of kids. But supposedly these are mall super cops and not to be fucked with. The little boy in me wants to drop a few hits, hop on my bike and go see how super these Rent-A-Cops can be.

killed softly at 5/18/2005 10:43:00 AM

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